Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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