well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
