I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
