Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize