Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
