WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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