check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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