first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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