I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Randomize
