if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
