rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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