I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
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