Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
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