Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
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