Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
He kissed a someone with a penis
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
