They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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