She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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