He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
