Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
