my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
