Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
