What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
