You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I take back everything I said about communal showers
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
