Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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