I can text with my tongue
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
i believe in u and ur pee
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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