Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Damn victory sex feels great
Randomize
