And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
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