shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
