I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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