forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
i now understand why vodka
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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