Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
