is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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