Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
