I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
