After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
