Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
