U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Randomize
