I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Randomize
