I could have mohawked her pubes.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize