well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
