another moral hangover. fuck.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Randomize
