you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
