I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
