Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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