You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
The power of my boobs compel you
Randomize
