yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Randomize
