what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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