just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
