Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
