okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
